Sailing Ships, Gypsys and the Point Spread
by Stepped in Chip
It was a typical dusty, dirty Delta day in August. The temperature languished somewhere between water's boiling point and the changing room at the Playboy mansion. The sensible man stayed hydrated, very hydrated. I, being a sensible man, was raising the third sheet on my personal inner voyage when she sat next to me. She was just another one toothed gypsy woman in a two bit town. It was as common here as seeing the word mom tattooed to the neck of a Carney anywhere else. We sat silently, her staring into her murky house merlot, and I loading cargo onto my ship like it was a commandment from Noah. Strangely, she asked this very peculiar question, "Do you take your cell phone to the track?"
I must admit, I was taken aback. Was this some local code to a confederate to roll me or worse, take a photo with? I know people with Cher albums and remember the song about these people. My pause was leaning toward indifference when I finally answered her. "Of course, how else would I bet on football?" She instantly lit up with enthusiasm.
"I knew it she said. Sometimes you can just tell in a person's face." Her story continued about her methods, strategies and system for playing the point spread. "I always play the 3D's on Thanksgiving unless Mercury is in retrograde with Mars. If that happens, Denver won't cover and Detroit and Dallas will lose. It is in the stars." She went on and on, I guess gypsy women are no different, about her system and how it never fails. I was fascinated by her story, but like most football prognosticators, was skeptical. "I may look a mess, she said, but I'm always right." With that she gave me some early season advice and can't miss picks. I can hardly wait for opening day kick off.