A Clear Conscience and A Cool Pillow
by Chip Light
I was sad sipping, sequestered in the corner, on what most days is my favorite bar stool. I was a wallow in the post-round blues, sullen, contemplative and down right un-Chip like. What was causing this funk? Was it the latest Iran crisis, OPEC or maybe Korea? Was it the lack of viable presidential candidates? No, this malaise ran deeper than trivial world matters. It was clearly a moral issue.
I had a conflicted conscience. My play had improved to the point where a penalty was accessed. The bible or Arnie Palmer clearly states "Where practice has improved, let no man reduce." (Book of Jack, 18:majors) The only way to get this Machiavellian penalty removed was to play in more tournaments at a lower handicap.
My dilemma, do I play a couple of "throw out" rounds to have my honestly earned handicap restored? Do I purposely cheat (play poorly) or do I chase the light that is the integrity of this game?
Sweat dripped from my untouched beer as well as my forehead. Finally, Bill the Web, broke my silent reverie when he said, "Chip we have a range, a chipping area and two putting greens. The opportunity to improve is right here, I don't get it."
Practice takes time, effort and a desire to improve I said. Too many of our stiffs want the results without the work. It is just like the public school system. They raise the graduation rates by lowering the standards. This way everyone feels good about themselves. They deserve Hillary Trump. Easy Chip, said the Web, finish that beer, order another and we will discuss something easy like the deficit.